Transcript 0:00 It's the Danger Gnome Podcast. Huge Ass Race Number One, November 2019. 0:07 [upbeat music] Well, here we are. 0:30 It's the Danger Gnome Podcast at the first in the, uh, Huge Ass Race series here at Lake Geneva Canopy Tours, and I have Kerry Gonzales with me. Hello, everybody. And, uh, Kerry put the course together. 0:45 Of course, Butch built a lot of these trails and designed a lot of these trails, and it's an old quarry on top of a giant esker or whatever they call these glacial drumlins. The drumlins. Drumlins. Yes. 0:57 And, uh- There's- So tell us wh- tell us about the course, and then we'll talk about the race. Well, this place makes for some awesome terrain. 1:04 We actually have the highest point in Walworth County on part of the, uh, course here, and it drops down about 150 feet to Highway 12, so there's plenty of vertical and lots of fun downhill lines. 1:17 So we tried to do what we did last year 'cause that course worked out really well, actually. 1:22 So, uh, it's nice to tie in one really technical descent called The Beer Mug, which, uh, some of us are familiar with around here. Yeah. And, uh, kind of nixed the, uh, heck of a climb back up. Right. 1:33 But, uh- How do you do that? Is it a l- elevator? Dump out onto the [laughs] Just hoping. You, you dump out onto the gravel track and, uh- Oh... 1:42 and then it meets up with everybody that drinks a beer and goes the easy way down and then, uh, timed it out this year so that way it actually is a little bit faster for the harder, more technical route. Oh, yeah. 1:53 So that way people actually wanna do it versus, "Oh, I'm just gonna take my beer and get a faster time." Gotcha. So, um- Cool... yeah, I think it'll make for a great course. Uh- Starts out with a big gravel climb, right? 2:04 Yeah, yeah, so your lungs are busting by the time you get to the top of that. And there's-- This is one of those race courses that's unique. It actually has tr- technical trail fe-features in it. Mm-hmm. 2:13 All, all of them have ride-arounds, or do you have to do some of them? Um- I-... we tried to make some ride-arounds, so you don't- Yeah... there's not a whole lot of... 2:21 Yeah, pretty much every wood feature you can, you can ride around. Uh- Cool. Um. We-- I ran a race here, like, I don't know, probably seven or eight years ago, and this building wasn't here, so this place is doing well. 2:32 Mm-hmm. Lake Geneva Canopy Tours. Yeah, yeah, I th- Um, it's an amazing place. Trying to get more people excited about coming out here. Uh, definitely good in the fall for fall riding and, uh, all winter long. 2:45 Um, staying on some of the more, uh, inside part of the trails where you don't have to get into the crazy steep climbs. Right, unless you like the crazy steep climbs. Mm-hmm. 2:55 And that's why we put trails in places like this for, for the climbs, up and down, am I right? Oh, yeah. So Huge Ass, it's the first of six races, and, uh, you, you have more experience than me. 3:06 This is my first Huge Ass race. Not-- I, I came and watched and saw that it was pretty kick-ass, but I'm, I'm actually gonna race in the, in the Citizen for the first time this... 3:17 So tell me, what, uh, what, uh, what's gonna happen to me today? 3:20 Uh, well, your, uh, heart rate will be quickly elevated, and your lungs will be burning by the time you get to the top of the hill, and by the time you hit the first single track, you'll be like, "Okay, this is fun again." 3:29 [laughs] And, uh, you might be catching people or watching yourself get passed and just eventually get back into the mix of things. And, and then at of one point, you realize, "You know what? This isn't really a race. 3:40 I'm gonna stop and have a beer." Nice. And, uh, it's great. Uh, or if you wanna keep chugging and go for that, uh, nice goodie bag on the podium- Oh... you can work your butt off and stay up with the fast guys. 3:51 It's, uh, it's nice options for everybody here. Cool. Well, uh, and, and Hammerschlagen, I actually did a test nail 'cause I've-- it's, uh, probably been, oh, I, uh, 10 years since I hammered [laughs] a nail. 4:03 [laughs] You know, they have those battery-operated screw guns now, so I heard it's all screws. Uh-huh. Oh. Uh, but yeah, I hammered a nail and, uh, I- Did you do it in rest mode or, uh, in high- In-... 4:14 high condition mode? I, I had just, I had just come off of a- [laughs]... of my warmup lap so, uh, yeah. Uh, it's a good point. Uh-huh. It is kind of the biathlon-y feel. It makes, it makes a difference, yeah. 4:24 But, uh, just to give you an idea, like, I completely missed the nail- Uh-huh... with my first hit, but then I hit it the next three. Uh-huh. And then, you know, I bent it over and it was bang. 4:32 Sometimes I get about five nails an eighth of an inch down before I hit the one that's gonna make it. [laughs] Well, cool. We're gonna have, uh, we're gonna try and talk to a variety of people. 4:44 Thanks for putting the course together. I saw a video [laughs] of you riding along with a backpack blower on blowing leaves off, so that's Kerry Gonzales you can thank for that clear course. Ah, yeah. Thank you. 4:54 You're welcome. So I, I think it'll help out a lot today. It's always better to see the trail ahead of you and, uh, let it rip. I think it'll be a fantastic day today. Right on. Awesome. 5:04 Huge Ass number one here at Lake Geneva Canopy Tours. We'll be back right after this. [upbeat music] So I heard you need a fat bike. Come to Zion Cyclery in Zion, Illinois. 5:16 We have all brands: Trek, Borealis, Salsa, Felt, Surly, and more. Yo, we have all the cold weather gears by 45NRTH and Bontrager. Keep those fingers and toes nice and toasty. 5:31 We fix bikes also, so you have any problem, brakes, gears, suspension, we have the best mechanics in town. So yeah, visit us at zioncyclery.com. 5:47 You're tuned to Fat Bike Radio. Hey, we're back. Hey, how you doing? And I've got, I've got Jeff Mead here. Hi, everybody. He's a, he's a dude from, from down in... Uh, you live by like McHenry or something. 6:04 McHenry, Illinois. What's the, what's the-[laughs] What's the, like, derogatory nickname for, uh, for Lake County there? What do they call it? Uh-oh. I don't know this one. No? 6:19 I just know we're all fucking Illinois bastards. Ah. [laughs] Well, we're up here in, uh, the annexed segment of, uh, Wisconsin, Lake Geneva. It's part of Illinois. It's surrounded by Wisconsin. 6:34 And, uh, we're at Lake Geneva Canopy Tours. This is the Danger Gnome Podcast, if you happen to nod off and wake up and this thing is still going. We have Jeff Mead here. He's... He also did the, the two-lap race, right? 6:48 The Huge Ass Fat Bike. Right. And, uh, he and I finished, like, right in order. We were the l- the last couple of miles. You passed me. Oh, here's Shannon. Hi. Shannon. Shannon's gonna join us. 7:00 Hey, have a seat and put one of those, uh, headsets on. This goes in front of your face. All right. Uh, so- I was dressed like Eeyore, though, so- Yeah, true... I was incredibly warm the entire time. 7:12 I had a Viking helmet cover on, and I did wear a plaid shirt. I'm doing an article, a, a flannel, a ride flannel shootout. Nice. 7:22 I have, I have a couple more coming in, some crazy, [laughs] crazy ones, one from Kitsbow that's, like, 225 bucks, and one from, from L.L.Bean, you know, like, the, the Maine Guide shirt. Hey, we have Shan- Fashion... 7:37 Shannon Chapwisk, who, uh- That's right. Hello... both of these guys are drank- drinking, drinking beers, and I'm having a Coke Zero. Cheers. It looks like... I think Shannon's having a, a, a root beer. 7:48 No, mine's an actual beer. I got this for you. What a guy. Look at this. [clears throat] 'Cause I know you're not drinking, but it has sugar. Yeah. Sorry. That's all right. Uh, so- What a mud bath... 8:00 did you also did, do the two-lap race? Yes. Or did you do the four-lap race? No, I did the two-lap. The two-lap. You finished way ahead of us. 16th. Yeah. We don't talk numbers at our, at our level. 8:12 No, this is- We're just back there... this is for fun. [laughs] This is all fun. I let every- I let everybody go, and then just kind of, like, plodded along and had fun. Yeah. Uh- Stop, have a beer, say hi to everybody. 8:24 I had to stop and pee once. [laughs] You know, on the- I should have stopped and taken some air out of my tires. Oh. It might have been a little easier. It was pretty greasy out there. It was squishy. 8:34 Those Minions do not shed mud. Good in snow, but- Yeah... mud. I don't know, man. The... On the 50s, they do a pretty good job. Uh, it's the, it's the tire clearance. 8:46 It just has so much room to throw mud, I think, with the, with the narrow rims. But if I had big ones on there, I, yeah, I think I would've... I, I made a mistake. 8:57 Going as small as possible today was, was a good idea, and a substantial amount of tread would've been a good idea. [coughs] Yeah, today wasn't the day to try out a brand-new 4.8 tire. [laughs] 4.6. Yeah. 9:09 I had three, 3.8- Juggern- Juggernauts would really suck today. [laughs] Or Hooskers or, you know. I had 3.8s at, uh, Iceman, and I had the 4.6s today, and I built up way, way more mud than I did at Iceman. 9:24 That bike was, like, 20 pounds heavier. So Jeff, you wanna walk us through how I, uh, how we managed to- [laughs] How you beat him... how I got past you in the last- You beat him... few feet. 9:34 [laughs] We were doing those, the little switchback climbs, and it was like a bunch of people stopped in, uh, in front of us, and I kinda went off to the left, and he's just like, "Zoop." 9:43 [laughs] We won't tease you about it. Yes, we will. [laughs] Uncle G got ya. Oh, he got me. It's the- Great racing... it, it's the geriatric- Podcast... You wanna be on our podcast? Uh, no. What's your name, darling? 9:57 Laura. See, we, we got groupies now coming to the podcast. It's Laura. [laughs] That's, that's Jared Collier's wife. Jared Collier's wife, crap. Jared will kick our ass if we call you a groupie. 10:08 You go to the bathroom- Do you wanna sit-... and then come back, and we can... [laughs] We can have- Boy, she ran away quick... we will have- Upset to miss the Funduro. Yeah. Bad timing. 10:16 But we did Iceman, and that was cool. Yeah, Iceman, you know. I could see where, you know, you, you two are elite racers, sponsored. 10:25 Uh, you know, you, you got, you got- It was our first time doing it, and I'm gonna say- Yeah... that it was a blast. That, that is- Yeah... such a, you know, a huge race. You have, you have to do it once. 10:34 And the finish area, dude, the, the finish area, they should hold every fa- every mountain bike race there. Every race. Every race like that. Every race. That was a party. 10:43 All you other places, Schwamegen, sorry, move it to Iceman. Yes. Or build a better- How'd you finish? I don't care. Where's the beer? Oh, it was just awesome. The beer, the brats, the egg rolls- The people... 10:53 the- Taco truck... the ribs, the, those, like- Bonfires... there's everything there. Yeah, it's just, it's a blast. Shout out to my buddy Dennis that works for Trek. We got some free beers. Pound it. Dennis. 11:04 [laughs] I have a friend Dennis. He's not even here yet. Or tell him Double D. No. Yeah, we'll talk to him. So but we'll be at the next one on the 3rd and 4th. Oh, why do you- 'Cause you had the Huge Ass race there, too. 11:15 Right, right. Quite right. But then, uh, it'll be Tony Grande's birthday, so- Quite right... he'll be the birthday princess that night. We gotta get Tony on this show. Yes. Mm-hmm. We can work that out. 11:26 We gotta give Tony away as a Tony Award. [laughs] I'm definitely getting him a princess crown and a sash for the 3rd and 4th. Really? Yeah. All right. It's his birthday. We're thinking about having a fashion show. 11:39 We see dressing him up in, like, some sort of a cross-country ski unitard. I was thinking a princess dress, but that'll be all right. Oh. [laughs] He, would he wear the, the, the- He was a Care Bear. 11:52 This is- He was a Care Bear today... Huge Ass might be, like, a underground plushy, like- Oh my God, yeah, the animal onesies today. There's... Yeah, there's, there's, like, a ton of you. 12:03 What, what- It's like- [laughs] What do they call those? The, the- That would be so cool to, like, come- Furries... 12:07 come around, come around a corner, and all of the people who are wearing the furries are all just, like, grinding on each other in one, one big weird thing. Yeah, there was quite a few furries out there today. 12:19 I mean, we had the Care Bear-I don't know what the hell you are. Eeyore? Eeyore. Is it Eeyore? Okay. Yeah. There was a couple unicorns. That's like a really- I shouldn't, I shouldn't have worn the wife's onesie. 12:29 You- It was a little small, a little tight, a little hot. You should have stayed in character, though. You should have been all like, "Oh, honey." I was. Where's the race? "Honey." Can I get a pass? "Okay." Okay. 12:39 [laughs] Woe is me. "I hit a root." Thanks, Gomez. "Stupid mud." [laughs] Gomez says, "I'm gonna pass you." "Okay." "Okay." Oh, we're bringing that up again? You got beat by Gomez? I did. Okay. Twice, in the same race. 12:56 We don't talk about it, though. It's r- it's really weird. We should have just joined hands and- I passed him when his Johnson was out, so... Oh. Did you save it? Did you save it on Wahoo? 13:06 'Cause you're a computer guy now. [laughs] Yeah, of course. Nice. My... We were going so slow at the beginning, my Wahoo was like, "Oh- Turn me on. Hello... ride paused, ride resumed, ride paused, ride resumed. 13:18 [laughs] It was like Jazzercise, but better. [laughs] Nice. So, any thoughts about today's race? Uh, it was fun. Is this a- I had a good time. Is this a typical Huge Ass? Is... 13:32 W- were there more people today than normal? Yes. Yeah, definitely. It was a shit show. It was a shit show. Hey, Leia Schneeberger just came to the table. Hey, Leia Schneeberger Rollins, actually. We should... 13:43 Actually, Princess... [laughs] Let's put that thing in the motherfucking Ice Queen. Oh, you gotta, you gotta get that straight. [laughs] Princess Leia Schneeberger Rollins- Princess... Phipps- No, you forgot Al... 13:54 Isn't it Alexander? Alexander. I got the order wrong- Yeah, it's-... of my own name. Princess Alexander- Yeah, didn't you say your mom was, like, listening? Princess Leia Alexander Phipps Schneeberger Rollins. Rollins. 14:06 Plasma. Ice Queen. Yeah, here you're the Ice Queen. Mud Queen today. The Mud Queen. [laughs] Welcome to the show. This is the first time that Leia's been on the Danger Nome podcast. Yeah, buddy. Should I be scared? 14:19 Yeah, you should actually have a little- I'm intimidated. You should have- [laughs] You should pull that hat up to a tighter point. Big old Care Bear sitting in front of me. I just wanna squeeze it. 14:28 He's Eeyore, not, not Care Bear. [laughs] He looks like a Care Bear to me. I was very warm. Now we got male groupies, man. [laughs] We got Leia here, Leia here. Ricky. [laughs] Now we got the male groupies coming. 14:42 [laughs] On the beehive, baby. [laughs] That's right. Honey. They're all following you in. Everybody stopped today. So Leia, did you, did you win the big, the four-lap race today? I, you know, I, I didn't do four laps. 14:53 I think I still won. Um, Amelia, she's like, "You were so far in front, um, I think we're just gonna call it from when you came through." Did they give you a bouquet of flowers at the front? And... 15:04 But actually, one of my teammates- They just told me to stop and drink beer... one of my teammates, I was, uh, trying to get my chain out, or my chain back on for, like, the 18th time, 15:13 and so one of my girlfriends, Katie, she goes by to finish off the last part of this last loop, and I cannot get this thing to stay on. I just roll in, and Amelia's like, "Yeah, sh- you know, you won" or whatever. 15:25 I'm like, "Well, Katie's still out there." She's like, "Well, do you wanna, do you wanna have it a tie?" I was like, "Yeah, man." She passed me. You and Katie- Yeah... on the, on the top. Yeah. 15:34 The more, the more people we can put in the podium, I think that would be good. Yeah. Be, like, 13 people up there. She deserves it. Her bike's still going. I- George will appreciate that, the broken spokes up there. 15:43 Yeah, exactly. Yep. Very nice. Podium paint over. So are we going to, uh, join forces of the- Well-... 15:53 Wonder Twins power, Wonder Trio power at the- You know, at the Snow Crown they're saying that they're just taking everybody and putting them in a pool, and- Are they doing it like gym class?... making the relay teams. 16:03 Like, like we did the teams, yeah? Like, they're gonna take an elite, an intermediate, and a beginner- Oh... and, and put them on a team, so that might actually work. Oh. Will there be snow? 16:11 Think we might actually get to r- ride together. Oh, yeah? Spinner will be the beginner. [laughs] You, you'll be the intermediate. I'll be on over the hill and- Will there be snow at Snow Crown? I'm tired of mud. 16:22 I'm, I'm... You know what? It's December 15th. I think I'm gonna wait until there's snow. It's a course- It's just getting stupid. It's a course that, that can be run in any kind of weather. 16:30 We have a Trek store on the east side of Madison that has a bike bath. I'm literally, I'm just gonna drive right up in there, have at it, suckers. Yeah. [laughs] I, yeah, I'll give you my 60 bucks- You got-... 16:40 'cause I am not touching this thing. You got the creek at, uh, at, at Shell Track. We can just all wash off in the creek. Just dip it. Well, Shell Track is nice 'cause it's very sandy. Yeah, true that. Yeah. 16:53 But, uh, d- what did you think of the course today? I love this course. I just wish it was- It's that guy right there... I wish there was snow. There's the guy that builds all these trails. There's that guy. 17:01 He just walked by. Hey, Butch. It's a Butch sighting. My wife would be so excited. [laughs] It's like a Butch sighting. Butch watching. "Oh, my God, you saw Butch." Yeah. [laughs] What'd you guys think? Gurdy. 17:13 I'm sick of the mud. Gurdy. Hey, Gurdy. I love these trails. I ride them like- My, my Van Halga shred mud. Yeah. Too many damn people, that's what I think. [laughs] But you beat half of them. 17:25 You're fast now, and you're a computer guy. Like, you're going... You beat Jeff. You beat me for the third time. Dude- It, it's something. I- You took it at the end. 17:34 Next, next time it's a race- He's like, "Oh, we're gonna finish. We're never gonna pass this guy" Okay, mud tip: don't wear, or don't ride 27 fives- Oh, I did today... on a muddy day. 17:42 I had my 26s, and I had no clearance. Yeah? Yep, the mud just came in, collected- 401 signal... and then pushed that- I rode, I rode-... chain... 50 millimeter rims with 3.8 27.5, so real skinny. 17:55 That's what I did with Ice Man. And it, it works really good. Yeah. Oh. That worked at Ice Man. Today sucked. I was struggle fest out there. Stupid. 20 pounds heavier bike. And still won, but tied with Katie. 18:04 But tied, yeah. [laughs] It was so much work. It was- So you're the Mud Princess now... it was so heavy. [laughs] I was like, "Oh, I'm pretty heavy." Did you race your bike today? [laughs] You raced your bike today? 18:16 Yeah, I was on my bike, but I don't have my wheels in yet. Oh. So I'm still borrowing- Oh... some 27 fives, but I ride 26s. 18:23 Right.And I was like, "Goddamn, of course I don't have my freaking wheels, and if I did, I would've been just fine." [laughs] George, hurry up on the build. I wanna run even more. George, hurry your ass up. 18:33 Hurry up on the build. God, I-9 takes forever to get anything done. George is the, the... is one of our three fans of the Danger Zone- [laughs] I know, he-... podcast... he does listen. 18:43 [laughs] And, uh, he- I love you, George... he'll, he'll be on it. [laughs] We all love George. You might have wheels by the time this airs. Get my wheels, sucker. Probably. I'm not racing- Even, even by next-... 18:52 until I get my wheels... because we have a- When this gets uploaded by the-... seven-second delay before it goes to the satellite for swears, so we can amplify those. Wait, we're allowed to swear on this? Yeah, I know. 19:01 I can't complain s- too hard 'cause he's like, "Oh, I'll let you, uh, just, you know, borrow this set of brand-new, uh, carbon head wheels with, uh- Let me see you wash them off when he's-... with the Dilly bars... 19:14 gonna sell 'em to somebody. [laughs] And, and you give them back all muddy. Yeah. [laughs] "Here you go. Are my wheels in? Here's this." That's what you get for not having my wheels. 19:22 [laughs] "Here's, here's dried peanut butter." The guy that's parked next to me has a brand-new specialized fat boy, and he got up to the top- Oh... to the top, and his chain sucked and broke, and he was, like, done. 19:35 [laughs] And, and his bike is just... it's just roached, right? So I was just like, "This is what you do. You take it back to the shop you bought it at." [laughs] To Orange. [laughs] "Don't clean it. 19:47 Just take it right to them right now, and you say, 'Dude, I rode this thing for a half a mile.'" [laughs] And it fell apart. "Need my money back." [laughs] "And it doesn't work." [laughs] "This thing's broken. 20:00 It, it doesn't work for me." [laughs] It's not working for me. I was like, "You're gonna be like, 'Sir, leave the store. Don't ever come back here.'" It, it seems like it attracts mud. 20:09 [laughs] Right, you're doing, you're doing it wrong, dude. [laughs] My new brake pads are making a squealing sound. I n- I need to- Well, under normal circumstances, the trail's closed. This is a private area, though. 20:21 This one usually drains good. And they, they would probably close it. It- It'll be fine in two hours. It was fine when it was- This trail will be awesome in two hours. Oh, yeah... the practice lap was, was muy bueno. 20:29 Yeah. It was all frozen. The practice lap was sweet. Well, and last year here it was 60 degrees and it was perfect. The year before that it was a mud fest also, and it was, like, a week before Chequamegon. 20:39 I ran a race here, and there was five inches of fresh- The first, before Birke. Birke, that's it, yeah... fresh, fresh snow. Yeah, it was, it was early on in the season. Mm-hmm. 20:46 So this downhill on the, on the back, we had a big bonfire l- this last downhill, and people were bombing it, and there was five inches of fresh snow, and they'd hit warp speed, and some of them had the most spectacular wipeouts where, like, [laughs] they would... 21:02 The snow would, like, be, like, five feet, like a poof- Like Fred... in the... Yeah. [laughs] In the air it'd be like, "Damn." Should probably put a mattress on that thing. 21:11 And, and the championship was decided by Indian leg wrestling because two teams had the, had the same number of laps, so the captains of... 21:19 They had to pick a person, and then [laughs] we ended up Indian leg wrestling in the gravel and the, and the tamped-down snow. It was awesome. I wish we had some. 21:30 You're looking at me like, like I'm from another freaking planet. [laughs] I think we're all just sick of mud. How many cookies have you had? We've had a lot of mud. I know. That pie with the fireball, mm. 21:39 We have baked pumpkin- Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum... fireball pie. It's like, uh, maybe sugar- That's really what got me here. Some lady posted that she was gonna bring that, and I was like, "Yeah, I'll go." 21:48 [laughs] Well, you, you brought that up on the last podcast too about the buffet here. Yeah. And you posted it- Slacking today... you posted on Facebook- Well-... "Is there gonna be a pot, a potluck?" 21:57 [laughs] Yeah, well, usually they have a potluck at this one. Yes. And, uh, so- Mm-hmm. They brought the pizza truck, though. Yeah, she got the pizza truck, but I like the potluck style 'cause- You don't bake. 22:07 Well- I don't bake, I don't cook, nothing. Yeah. But I will eat everybody else's food, all of it. Dude, yeah, you gotta, you have- [laughs]... you have to meet my wife. 22:16 My wife is, like, the super baker, and she would like it because- I love baker... she loves to bake, and, you know, I used to be a big consumer [laughs] of that. I'ma go to Hyvee- Maybe not so much anymore... 22:25 and pick up the cookies. We'll have to make you some almond cookies. Yeah. Nice. You would love some almond cookies. All right. You're not doing cookies at all, though. You're not doing anything. No. 22:34 No, but that's not what, that's not what he's talking about. Yeah, he's so boring and skinny now. Yeah. All my cookies have a lot of broccoli. I think that... See, I, I think that I'm crazier than ever. 22:45 [laughs] I have crazier thoughts than ever. I am a lunatic. [laughs] That's all, that's... Yeah. Somebody- It's all that, that healthy hemp food. [laughs] I think- All that granola food... 22:58 I think that's what, I think that's what he was talking about with the almond cookies 'cause he was giving me that look, like- That, uh, yeah... almond cookies. They might have some CBD in them. Oh. Oh, shit. 23:10 [laughs] So what the hell are you gonna do for Thanksgiving? Just turkey plain? No, I think I'm... I, I think I'm ordering live lobsters. Nice. 'Cause it's just the wife and I and the dog. One for each of us. 23:22 Dogs can eat live lobster, right? Why not? It'd be, like, kind of a cool thing, be like lobster versus Brittany's mountain dog. Just make sure you dip it in real butter. Yeah. No margarine. No margarine. 23:34 No, none of that. It's garbage. None of that nonsense. No nonsense. And no pie. Yeah, no pie. I live for the pie. I have... A, you know, like, a big treat for me is, like, low-sugar yogurt. Yeah. Oh. 23:47 Sugar-free popsicles. Oh, I'm sorry. I was gonna say, like, yeah, bring on the pecan pie, the pumpkin pie. Like, screw the turkey. [laughs] Turkey, man. This is, this is the time to sugar up. 23:58 Yeah, you can't eat the turkey or you'll fall asleep before you get to pie. Exactly. [laughs] I'm thinking lobster. I like, I like crab legs though too. Lobster's a good call. 24:07 A live one too so I can watch it, so I can listen to it scream. God, there's so much I'm gonna have to cut out of this podcast. [laughs] Speaking of cutting out, I think I'm gonna go grab a piece of pie. 24:20 Grab- It's been real, fellas. All right, ladies. See you, idiots. Thanks for letting me join you for a second. Nieman Rawlins. I appreciate it. No, we get that. I love y'all. 24:26 Huge ass serious champion and, uh- You guysI think we're all out of beer, so we're about done here. Yeah. [laughs] That's it for this segment of the- Danger Zone... 24:35 Danger Zone podcast from the Huge Ass Race here at the Lake Geneva Canopy Tours. We'll be right back after a word from Four Sisters Restaurant in Jefferson. That's where I had breakfast today. 24:50 There's a waitress there that looks a lot like Flo, like, from the old Mel's Diner. [laughs] It's crazy. Uh, yeah, so- Well, thanks, Gomez... there's questions on the podcast today. Hey, you're welcome, Shannon. 25:01 Awesome seeing you. Shannon's gonna be on every one of our shows that I do from Huge Ass, 'cause he said, 'cause- Sorry, listeners... he s- he signed the contract [laughs] I will try. I'll try my best. He sucked, no. 25:13 He sucked. Sorry, listeners. [laughs] I still beat you- All right, well-... but you lost to Gomez. Yeah, we'll see. We'll see next race. Mm-hmm. I'm gonna super train. Yeah, gun for me. Okay. Later, everybody. See ya. 25:24 Bye. Hey, we have the commissioner of the Huge Ass Race Series, the man, his bad own self, Mr. Hugh Jass on the television program that's a radio program that's actually a podcast. [laughs] Awesome. 25:40 Thanks for having me today. So Hugh, uh, tell the folks about the madness that is a Huge Ass Race party. Oh, man, we throw one heck of a party, let me tell ya. Like, this, this party's for everybody. 25:55 It's for, uh, you know, the youngins all the way up to the experienced racer, and everybody in between. So if you wanna have a great time, we're the spot to show up. 26:07 So, uh, the, the series, I think it's in its fifth year, right? Yeah, it's in its fifth year. 26:12 It had one year prior to our launch, um, but, uh, y- you know, we did so good that first year, we wanted to bring, you know, Huge Ass Race Series to everybody, and that's when we started the big, fun race parties. 26:27 And, uh, were you... W- was your dad a carpenter? Uh, was, uh- A lumberjack, you know? [laughs] Oh, a lumberjack. He needed to- That's right. 26:37 Yeah, yeah, he needed to bring them trees down, and, and, uh, you know, we thought we'd, we'd just keep the vibe going there. So that's where the Hammerschlagen came in. 26:45 That's where I was going with the, with the carpenter, but, uh, could've been a roofer, too, or a, or a blacksmith. Yeah, well, once you bring the tr- yeah, once you bring the trees down, you gotta put them together. 26:54 You know what I'm saying? So it, it just all fits. I hear you. It all fits. You know, my, my dad, John L., he, he liked to get hammered, so, you know, he would've been right there. [laughs] But, uh- Yeah, we- [laughs] 27:08 That's a whole different story. Yeah. So- Yeah, I mean, we, we could tell you some stories about that as well, but we're gonna stick to the race today. I actually participated, uh, in, in my first Huge Ass Race. 27:20 It's just been, uh, a, a day ago now, so, uh, 27:24 the Hammerschlagen was not as challenging as I thought it was gonna be, and I'm [laughs] not that coordinated, nor do I hammer things all that often [laughs] Well, it's just- Or maybe I just had beginner's luck or something. 27:36 Man, it's, it's a, that's a cool event. Uh, right in the middle of the race, stopping in, you have to drive a hammer into a, a freshly cut log, and then roll out, and you'd be surprised. 27:48 The, the tradesmen, you can tell those guys, 'cause they roll in and give it one good hammer, and the nail's in, and then they roll out. Wow, a one-hitter. 27:55 Um, you can tell the people that have never h- held the hammer before. [laughs] You can tell they're struggling a little bit. [laughs] Well, it's a skill I must have in some kind of modicum. 28:05 I- I'm just [laughs] probably better at that than I am at bike riding. [laughs] But- Yeah, well, I think there's, uh, some folks that, uh, it's the latter, you know? 28:15 They're better at the riding than the hammering [laughs] So how many, uh, how many people were there? It was, like, 230? 28:22 I said over 250, but that could've been doing, you know, the exaggeration thing [laughs] You know, it's right, it's right in there. Yeah. 28:29 Amelia, who's our race director, she has all the official numbers, but it was, it was right in there. This was a great event at, at Canopies. So, um, awesome trail system. 28:39 A little, a little greasy out there in the woods, but we like it that way, so. Yeah, I, uh, I found clumps of mud the size of silver dollars on... 28:50 Well, you know, they weren't all round, but, you know, like, voluminous clods of mud on my, uh, frame bag and whatnot, and then we rolled- Yeah... 28:59 out of the mud and into the [laughs] gravel parking lot, so I took some, took some gravel parking lot home with me, too. It was pretty cool. 29:08 Yeah, I, I think we were weighing bikes in at about five pounds heavier- Yeah... than before they came in, but I mean, that's- I thought about doing the before and after [laughs] weight... that's part. 29:16 But I didn't do it. I'm glad I'm not the only one. [laughs] I had to- Yeah... try, try and drive those- It was a good time... thoughts out of my head. Well, cool. 29:25 All right, so- And what's the, what's the next race in the series? 29:29 Yeah, so the next race, we're gonna be meeting at, uh, Trek Headquarters, December 14th, at Waterloo, like, right there, smack dab on their cyclocross course. Um, it is an amazing venue. 29:44 You know, word is that there's, like, a secret bar in the back, um, of the race course. I know all about that bar. It's one of my favorites. [laughs] With the shot ski and the grass skirts and the- Oh, there's... 29:56 Yeah, there's some, there's some crazy stuff back there. [laughs] Yeah, if, uh, if you've never been to Waterloo- The banjos [laughs] Yeah, you know, we, we wanna keep it real country-like- Mm-hmm... out there. Oh, yeah. 30:08 You have to. But yeah, really good time. Come out, join us there. That one's a blast. And don't they have a flyover there? Yeah, the flyover's amazing. If we have snow, there's a little bit of carnage, right? 30:20 But, uh, no snow, it just, it's, it's a quick up and over, and, uh, that tends to be where we put our beer shortcut. 30:28 So if you're not into rolling up and sliding down, um, you just take the shortcut and you're good to go.Cool. 30:36 And after that, actually, uh, we're, uh, we're teaming together with you and Zion Cyclery and fatbike.com for a, uh, Fatter By The Lake winter weekend festival of fat biking down in Zion- Yeah... 30:53 on the beach. I'm excited about that one. We've never been there before- Ah... and that one is just-- I'm excited to get there and see, you know, what we can do. It, it sounds amazing. 31:02 I'm telling you, it could be, it could be really, uh... 31:06 You know, if we, if we did it Little 500 style in that campground with all the teams on the, uh, whatever they call the, the in- inner part of a looped race course, the infield, right? 31:20 So all the teams in the infield- Yeah... in, in an encampment, ah, I think it would be good. Uh- Yeah. That sounds great. I'd love that. 31:27 And it can handle any kind of weather too, that's the thing, and if we have snow it could be [laughs] super cool. But even without snow- Yeah... you're gonna have a pretty nice fast-paced event, you know? 31:42 It's gonna be good. And- Yeah, there's a lot of sand on that course I hear, right? Yep. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And just a trace amount of asbestos. [laughs] Just kidding. [laughs] Wear your masks, everybody. Yeah. 31:57 [laughs] See your doctor regularly. Get that checkup. Yeah. Yeah. [laughs] So Hugh, what, uh, w- what, what inspired you to, uh, you know, make this kick-ass race series? Oh, you know what? 32:15 What were the-- What, what bands did you listen to [laughs] you know? Like, what races or events did you go to that said, "Hey man, I wanna, I wanna swing my bike fun this way"? 32:27 Well, you know, it's, it was growing for years, and we just thought, "Hey, we could make this incredibly fun and really get a lot of people out riding." 32:36 That's our goal, more people on fat bikes riding year-round, out in the snow, in the cold, beardsicles, just, just having fun and, and drinking beer and hanging out and just having a good time. 32:48 I mean, that's really where this was rooted. And that first year we had it, um, actually your, uh, one of your associates, Ron Stuwecki- Oh, yeah. Yeah... uh, really helped us kick that first one off. 33:01 And that one was a real local race for us. Mm-hmm. And, you know, we're just, we're just like, "Let's-- How do we get people involved? How do we get people fat biking?" And, uh, we started that Thursday night series. 33:13 Oh, yeah? And, uh, that was- At, uh, Lapham Peak? Yeah. Or was that at Minooka? Yeah, that's really... No, that was at Lapham that- Mm-hmm... that first year. 33:21 And, um, you know, it was, uh, it was really about getting people out and, and hanging out. And, um, you know, the best starting race line came from Ron, actually. 33:31 It was, um, you know, w- we're out here in the dark racing in a corn field in the snow, so let's not try to take ourselves too seriously. [laughs] We're out here to have a good time and drink some beer. 33:44 [laughs] So that's, uh, how it started, and it just, it grew from there because, um, so many people showed up, and we're like, "We gotta bring this to everybody." And that's, um, how the race series actually started, so. 33:58 I, I, I just think you have the, the perfect blend of a race and a non-race all going [laughs] on at the same time. It's pretty fantastic. Yeah, it's for everybody, man. 34:10 The, the fast racers, they can go out and, and really hammer and, and the race courses are usually long enough where it can be a challenge for them and, and, uh, you know, they're competing. And then 34:22 everybody who's, who's a citizen racer or a, a brand new fat bike rider, it's designed to let everybody ride and have a good time. So don't let the word race scare you away, folks. This is a party. [laughs] Okay? 34:39 Right on. Well, Hugh, it has been a pleasure speaking to you. I hope we get to talk to you again throughout the series. I, I'm gonna miss the next one. 34:47 I was looking forward to going, but then I'm gonna go do another race, but I'll be back. 34:51 I'll be back for that third, and we'll probably record something else, and there'll be, uh, there'll be all kinds of craziness going on that weekend. So I, uh, hope to toast you in person. We're on the phone now. 35:05 All right, man. Yeah, I'm-- I look forward to that. You know, Zion's gonna be a blast, so everybody should come out to that one. That one's gonna be epic. 35:12 Yeah, but, uh, check out the, uh, Trek HQ there in Waterloo on the 14th for- Okay. That's right... if you're doing the whole series. And, and, uh, you know, sign up for the whole series. It's a good thing. 35:25 Yeah, it's a blast. Come on out, guys. Hugh Jass, ladies and gentlemen. Thanks for being on the show. Thank you. Thanks for having me. Awesome. 35:33 [outro music][outro jingle]
