Klunky Summer Ride Apparel

I’ve been online shopping again. This means we’ve got a new collection of this summer’s hottest ride fashions for the non-kit-wearing crowd. And believe (you) me, I see the humor and irony in my having any fashion sense at all. So, maybe ‘Summer Ride Fashions for Stout Geezers’ would have been a more accurate title but I thought Klunky was a pretty good synonym. So with tongue firmly planted in cheek, it’s fat bike fashion week from your tio gomez!

Stio Shifter Trail Shirt $115 (on sale for 57.50)

I like to muse that I put the ‘sport back in sports shirts. The Stio Shifter Trail Shirt is a generously sized Hawaiian shirt with western snaps. It sounds strange, but Hawaiian Cowboys are a thing. The fabric is a lightweight, stretchy, synthetic blend that feels good against the skin. There’s a zippered pocket on the shirttail and two chest pockets with snap closures. The Shifter’s color and pattern caught my eye and the Kona Cowboy construction and nice details sealed the deal. I’ve been wearing it a lot lately. The small plastic snaps are really nice. From trail to the coffee shop, or bar rail, this is a collared shirt that has me considering buying another one.

Gorewear Fernflow Liners $90 and Bib Liners $130

I like to ride in shorts with padding. Over the last few years, companies have been making liner shorts that are designed to be run under a pair of outer MTB shorts. The fern flow shorts and bib liners from Gorewear fall into that category. They have large mesh panels that allow for added ventilation. I like to ride out to Rock Lake and take a swim on hot summer days. These liners are well-suited for that type of summer fun! I’m a fan of the Elastic Interface padded chamois. Both the bibs and the shorts fit me very well. The bibs have pockets built into them. I’ve tried a couple of these new backcountry bibs with side and rear pockets. It might just be me, but I haven’t found them to be very easy to access. (YMMV)

Cognative Guide Trail MTB Shorts – $100

I thought that I should round out my summer apparel with a pair of shorts to wear over those new Gorewear liners. I snagged a pair of these shorts when I ordered the gloves that I mention below. The advent of integrating stretchy material into ride shorts has been essential to making them more comfortable for me.

This particular pair of stretchy over shorts has a couple of cool features that score points. They have a waist adjustment and the two zippered thigh pockets can swallow a giant smartphone comfortably. The only strike against the shorts is that they’re a little too long for my liking. They catch on my kneecaps. I guess I need to get them hemmed. They probably made that way for riders who wear kneepads while riding. I like this new brand. It seems to be run by riders. They even have an open invitation to ride with them on their website. 

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Cognative MTB Summer Mountain Bike Glove – Cosmic Stoke – $30

Lots of kids my age grew up watching astronauts do amazing shit. The iconic silhouette of an Appolo mission spacesuit always grabs onto what’s left of my ten-year-old brain and gives it a little shake. The image of the moon man lives on in the new century on a pair of summer ride gloves from cognitive MTB. I online shopped these bad boys and I’ve been wearing them on mountain bike rides. I’m good with a glove that doesn’t have any built-in padding and these gloves fall into that category. They feel very formfitting, and there is no Velcro wrist closure so getting them on and off is a little more difficult but once applied, they feel like a second skin. 

Hippy Feet Shroom Socks – $19

I might have a sock addiction, so when I saw these Amanita mushroom socks on the inter-webs, I had to order a pair. You have to admit that they’re totally groovy! The color scheme harmonizes with either olive drab or blue. Hippie Feet has a bunch of other sterling examples of their men’s fashion hosiery at their online store. www.hippiefeet.whatever